idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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