There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
