I want to stick my p in your. b.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
only you would photoshop your dick
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize