I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize