ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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