Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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