maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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