I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he was CRYING into my vagina
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
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