ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
