Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize