Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
