I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Randomize
