But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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