But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
