whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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