Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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