If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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