You made me cry and you don't even care
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize