Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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