listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
It's shark week go big or go home
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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