Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize