i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
