Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.