Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?

(914): View more from New York

please be gone before i get back

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?

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(845): View more from New York

you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away

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(812): View more from Indiana

He just called me juicy booty via text message.

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27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Read it at the TFLN blog
(817): View more from Texas

I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.

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(812): View more from Indiana

Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts

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(512): View more from Texas

He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game

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(415): View more from California

Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"

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