she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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