It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
