don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
