i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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