I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
They took my balls.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Enjoy the penises
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
