thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
