Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
i believe in u and ur pee
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
