Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably

(1-404): View more from Georgia

No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars

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(256): View more from Alabama

Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home

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23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(913): View more from Kansas

I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I stole a fireplace last night.

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(503): View more from Oregon

It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.

(541): View more from Oregon

I'm dying.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.

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(646): View more from New York

I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole

(516): View more from New York

Hahaha oops.

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