Dude, you need to talk to your mom
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.