none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
