i jhust puked up my retainher.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
