Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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