you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize