The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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