so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
