Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
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