Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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