Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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