Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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