he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
