GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Fuck me I smell like cheese
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize