i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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