I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
