oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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