I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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