underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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