i think i have herpe
just one?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
