Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
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